Alright reader, we are going to go back to Georgia, the country. But first, I am going to go further back to the World Race application process. As a racer, you have to go through an interview and share your testimony. Due to some of the content and history I’ve had with boys, I didn’t think they would have put me on a team with guys.
Okay, fast forward to our last team change in Georgia. As the anticipation of team changes came up, I had come to terms with the fact that I would never be on a coed team. Everyone asked me who I would want to be on a team with and my reply was always the same, “Well I can tell you who I don’t want to be on a team with.”
I love our squad and I was excited to have anyone on my team, except guys. Except one specific guy. You can only imagine my confusion as I walked up to my new team and saw two guys: Jacken and Justin. I thought there had to be a mistake. I was scared of them; they brought up a LOT from my past. Now, this was unintentional on their end, and it was not their fault in the slightest.
The more I’ve shared my testimony, the more the Lord brought to light. Some things I’ve shared, others I haven’t. I’ve had a pretty rocky relationship with guys in the past whether it was a romantic relationship or if we were simply friends. They all ended pretty poorly or I was left with deep hurts. Even if I played the role of being fine and even remaining friends, I have only really had an unhealthy and very skewed view of how guys should act. Some of my relationships were abusive, others just used me, one was very manipulative and is something I have not fully dealt with. Now I know not all guys are bad, I have some great men in my life. But overall I was just fine with being on another all-girls team.
As always, the Lord had other plans for me. Little did I know how redemptive this year would be for me. I met one of my best guy friends, Double-A as my family calls him. (That is a whole other blog, but let it be known the Lord also used him.) At training camp I knew the guys on my squad were different. They surprised all the girls with pizza after being separated for a gender day. In Guatemala I met some WR Gap Year guys that also showed me that whoever I marry is worth the wait. I was happy and content with the distance of not being on the same team as guys, and having shorter encounters.
Then Georgia came and I met my last team, followed by smiles and reassuring nods from some of our squad leaders. I shared my fears of being on a team with the person I did not want to be with. Then we got the news that we would have Tito as our squad leader, someone I verbalized I was intimidated by. All I could think of as I looked at my team was, “Lord, what are you doing here?”
Now if you asked my team, I was thrilled, but deep down I was kind of terrified. Later in the evening I pulled this person aside and was honest with them. I shared that I was nervous and that he triggered parts of my past that I had been shoving down. I apologized for projecting that onto him and that I didn’t want to keep that to myself, knowing how the enemy works. The response was better than I thought, and Tito was there to pray with us. It was a sweet moment.
Alright, the question you might be wondering: What is it like being on a coed team? Well, it has not been at all what I anticipated. Tito (who I told back in Turkey I was scared of because he intimidated me) and I are great friends now. We had many meals together, shared our love for The Office, and created a sweet friendship in our short time together. He is definitely someone you want on your team. Tito, before he left for another team, taught me what selfless generosity looks like, how to love others well. He is someone you look at and want to be friends with. I’m just lucky he let me follow him around like a little sister who wants to hang out with their older sibling.
Jacken, my team leader, and I already had a friendship before being on a team together, and are both storytellers. I was excited to do life with him. He is someone I have a deep respect for. We spend the majority of our time together working, laughing, and having deep conversations. I was pretty excited to have a good friend from the squad on my team. My excitement grew, even more, when I found out he would be my leader. Now one thing you need to know is Jacken, like the other two on my team, are men of God. I was thrilled to have an opportunity to learn more from him. I could go on forever about him and Tito, but I’ve been told I have you for 500 words before you tap out, and I know it’s been more than 500 already.
And the person you’ve probably been wondering about, the one I did not want to be on a team with: Justin. Well, I am happy to report we are good friends. He has been someone I have looked up to, and I admire his walk with the Lord. I mean honestly ask anyone about this man. I promise they’ll have nothing but good things to say. I have never laughed as often or as hard with anyone else. I have some of the most fun with this team and a large part is from goat noises and Indian food runs. From walks to getting fruit or smoothies while having deep conversations, to filming the safety video for the squad. Justin has made the last part of my race one of my favorite seasons.
It is never and I mean never a dull moment with these three. Even while trying to take marketing pictures for the World Race 90% of them were goofy shots. Which we all love.
Our first month as a team we were in a smaller apartment with one bathroom. This was a constant thing on our mirror from the guys.
One of my love languages I am learning is actually gifts. Very specific ones though, gifts like my favorite coffee order, or my favorite treat. It’s not really the gift but the remembering of things I like. I had mentioned in passing I loved M&Ms and the next day Tito brought me these. Even after our first movie night Justin bought me a jar of peanut butter and bananas because I told him that was my favorite snack. Jacken is also one of the most generous people I know, constantly buying us coffee, or dinner on occasion.
I love my whole team, but the tribute to Team Leviathan will have to wait for month 11. For now, this one is for the boys. Thank you, Tito, Jacken, and Justin for teaching me, for laughing with me, and for late-night walks. For remembering my coffee order and surprising all of us in the morning with coffee. Thank you for getting my favorite snack for our movie nights, and for letting me verbal process my life. Thank you for being leaders and examples. Thank you for loving me so well.
ABBEY!! It is a pleasure to be your friend and walk alongside you on this journey. I have loved watching you grow and have enjoyed you challenging me to look and act more like Christ. Thrilled to finish this race with you! Know that you are deeply loved!
Ok, I love this SO much!! I’m so happy for your healing and healthy encounters (: I love you!!
Cmooonnnnnn Abbey!
Thanks for your transparency, vulnerability, and honesty Abbey. There’s no doubt in my mind you are well into the process of turning around what others along with the enemy’s help, have intended for evil, you are clearly and redemptively using it for good.
So proud of you for allowing them to show you what young men of God in the making look like and for you in turn , showing them, what young women of God in the making look like as well.
Great peice Abbey thanks
ABBEY!!! I freaking love this blog!! So stinkin sweet.
THIS! IS! SO! GOOD!!! Proud of you for not bowing down to fear.